Posts Tagged ‘Humour’

Whiter Shade of Pale


We were just sitting down and our legs were outstretched. Suddenly someone commented on mine.

My first thoughts were “What, are they so fat that they have drawn attention?!”

I need not have feared. Attention was drawn because of the colour.

IMG_7778I have to admit, I look kind of anaemic here…… !

Says it all



Say What?


Saw this in a shop the other day. Doesn’t sound right at all does it.


Enlisted Help


I went to do some training the other night. There, due to limited equipment availability, I had to improvise and adjust the setting. The floor of the meeting venue had black lines. This meant that the wire for the projector almost camouflage into its surroundings. It was an accident waiting to happen. So I decided to enlist some help.

Do you like my cute buddy? Haha! No one tripped over the wire as a result and we had fun that night!

Make Up Removal


The funniest conversation in a long time.

I text Hubby. It’s been so busy that I haven’t had the time to go get some urgently needed things. One of which is makeup remover for Arrow #3. So I ask Hubby to do it. Specific instructions. Brand, type of remover and the size of bottle. I even tell him what colour it is. What more could you want? It’s an off-the-shelf kind of product.

Phone call #1 – Hubby is at a particular shop (no where near the one I suggest) Is that ok he want to know. What can I say? I am busy. If he can get it there, why not.

Phone call #2 – Hubby asks what about cream. I give him a quick no. I had someone waiting to see me.

Phone call #3 -Hubby says that is this wonderful cream. I give him a quick explanation about lotions and creams and then he realises I want a liquid….

Phone call #4 – Hubby wants to know whether baby wipes will do. No, that’s for the baby’s bottom.

Phone call #5 – Hubby asks what if he gets both the baby wipes and the cream – will that combination do? I sigh. I laugh. I say never mind. I will get it.

Phone call #6 – Hubby checks the colours of the remover. Wow! He is on track!

Phone call #7 – Hubby announces he has found the right remover! Yes! But it is a small bottle. Never mind! Get it!

Thank you….

Lesson learned – never send a man to get a woman’s thing. Hahahahahaha!

I Got the Message


OK, so I have been working hard lately.

True, I have been having less sleep of late.

Fine, I admit I haven’t been eating much either.

I acknowledged that I have not drunk enough water or the like.

So I know I don’t really look my best right now.

But this didn’t hit home till I got these…. three lots of gifts from three different people!

I must say I did have a good chuckle.

And then I grabbed the first tub and lathered a good thick layer on!

P.S. It works!

Bottoms Up!


Just came back from the gym today.

I was inspired to go because of a conversation I had over lunch a few weeks ago.

This person I know will jump on the trampoline at least 3 times a week. Then, of late, she was encouraged to go on the Stair Master.

I find both almost kill me.

But I am inspired to go to the gym nonetheless. Why?

Because she can wear good jeans! And she has a decent bottom! A butt! a derriere! Or whatever you want to call it, she HAS it!

There is something about good fitting jeans and a lady’s pert bottom! Combine both and you will have oohs! and aahs! not only from men but women too. The silent or otherwise appreciative expressions are further enhanced by apple bottoms – the jeans that my friend adores….

Come to think of it, she could even be a model or promoter for them!

As for me, I just want my gluteus maximus to arise!

Getting Good Results


With the children coming back for hols, it is going to be fun …. and yet not so fun.

It’s great when the children get together, revisiting their previous hangouts, reminiscing in their own way. I don’t mind surrendering the car for them to go nipping here and there, getting more snapshots of memories in their own unique and exuberant ways.

It’s not so fun when people start comparing though. Comparing results that is. Parents especially. The children are usually cool about this sort of thing.

Have you ever been at the receiving end of boasting parents? These usually talk about how they helped their children to get good SAT scores with special SAT prep by this person or that company. They also lament that one mark or two that their children lost from carelessness of course. But then of course they quickly go on to say that these losses didn’t affect the overall marks – they still aced their exams.

Gosh. I am so glad my children didn’t need all that prep and I don’t need to do all that boasting because they aced anyway.

Ha! Ha! Did you see that one coming?

Captions Wanted


He was supposed to have been passed on to some children to play with.

But somehow he got left behind.

Someone stuck him up on the blinds. He looked cool there. Dont you think so too? Especially with his sunglasses!

But over time, he was forgotten.

And he got neglected.

It was almost as if he felt insignificant.

And small.

And he shrunk in the eyes of man.

*Laughing out loud*

Such a sad story. Is there a moral to this? Is there a happy ending?

Answers and suggestions welcome! The winner…. let’s see… I’ll have to think of something to give away. No, not balloons!

A Better Option


This is dedicated to SH who knows the Ouch! of doing the business which can be painful if you have it.

Dreading what is natural is unnatural when you suffer from it.

It can be bloody and unsightly when it is literally a pain in the backside.

What am I talking about?

Haemorrhoids. Yes that pain in the unmentionable. It does pile on the agony every time you need to go.

An operation is but one remedy, and a drastic one at that.

But hemorrhoids creams might be a better option. It is certainly less fearful.

So there you are, SH. My two sens’ worth!